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"Self-Driven Growth: How to Scientifically and Effectively Cultivate Children's Self-Discipline" Author: [US] William Stixrud / Ned Johnson Publisher: Machinery Industry Press
"Self-Driven Growth: How to Scientifically and Effectively Cultivate Children's Self-Discipline" Author: [US] William Stixrud / Ned Johnson Publisher: Machinery Industry Press
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Description
Introduction · · · · · ·
Most parents insist on doing everything for their children, from homework to friendships to college choices, which puts children under tremendous pressure. Parenting is about teaching children to think and act independently, so that they can have the decisiveness to help them succeed in school and in life. We should find ways to help children find what they love and further explore their inner motivations, rather than forcing them to do things they don't want to do.
The two authors of this book, clinical neuropsychologist William and inspirational educator Ned, reveal the most essential issue in raising children: How do we help children gain a sense of control over their lives, find their own inner motivation, and fully realize their potential?
Based on pre-existing neuroscience research that is universally applicable to any individual, this book focuses on four key points:
1. Severe or chronic stress has a very negative impact on the developing brain and is a risk factor for the global epidemic of stress-related emotional problems (such as anxiety and depression).
2. A low sense of control is one of the most stressful things a human being can experience. It can further lead to stress-related mental health problems and reduce children's academic learning and performance.
3. All healthy self-motivation is actually rooted in a sense of control, competence or autonomy.
4. Developing a healthy sense of control leads to a variety of positive outcomes, including better physical and mental health, greater internal motivation, better academic performance, and higher levels of career success.
At the same time, the book is supplemented with a large number of real cases and practical methods, which can scientifically and effectively guide you on how to lead your children steadily towards success.
About the Author · · · · · ·
William Stixrud, PhD
A clinical neuropsychologist, member of the Children's National Medical Center, and faculty member of the George Washington University School of Medicine. His lectures cover the fields of adolescent brain development, meditation, the mechanisms of stress, sleep loss, and the negative effects of new technologies on the brain. He has also published a series of influential scientific papers.
Ned Johnson
The founder of PrepMatters, a family tutoring business in Washington, D.C., and a popular speaker, he also coaches teens on study skills, parent-child interactions, and anxiety management. His work has been featured in National Public Radio, Time, The Washington Post, and The Wall Street Journal.
Table of contents · · · · · ·
Hitting the sweet spot: better understanding of stress┆6
There is a world in the brain┆8
Stress, Anxiety and Depression┆15
Why this matters ┆16
Warning on Control┆19
What to do tonight ┆20
Chapter 2 "I love you too much to argue with you about homework": Consultant Parents ┆22
"Homework Wars" ┆26
Why the brain likes the consultant model ┆31
“But…” The Challenge of Parents as Consultants┆35
Summary┆43
What to do tonight┆45
Chapter 3 "It's up to you": Children who can make their own decisions ┆46
"You decide" shouldn't mean this.
There are 6 reasons to prove that we are right┆52
Sense of control over actions┆58
Where does the difficulty come from: some common problems┆64
What to do tonight┆71
Chapter 4: Non-anxious presence: How to help your child find his or her own sense of control ┆73
Trickle Anxiety┆75
Calmness is also "contagious" ┆82
How to Become a “Non-Anxious Presence” ┆86
Face your greatest fear calmly┆89
What to do tonight ┆93
Chapter 5 Intrinsic motivation: How to cultivate children's enthusiasm ┆96
What attracts us?
"I don't want to think like a middle-aged man" ┆104
Common Motivation Problems and Their Solutions┆107
What to do tonight ┆120
Chapter 6 Complete shutdown period ┆122
Mind Wandering: The Benefits of Daydreaming ┆123
Meditation of the Mind┆128
Mindfulness┆129
Meditation ┆130
What do parents often ask us?
What to do tonight ┆135
Chapter 7 Sleep: The most complete downtime┆137
Sleep and the Brain┆139
Once you get some rest... ┆143
What to do tonight┆152
Chapter 8 Bringing a sense of control into school ┆155
Let children be more involved┆157
Reduce academic demands and stress levels┆159
Homework: Inspire, don't force ┆164
Teach your children when they are ready┆166
Test your kids the right way┆170
How to bring a sense of control into school┆172
What to do tonight┆174
Chapter 9: Online 24/7: Taming the Beast of Technology ┆176
Disadvantages of new technology┆182
Taming the Beast┆189
Some common questions┆195
Another cultural shift┆199
What to do tonight ┆200
Chapter 10 Exercise the Brain and Body ┆202
Exercise 1: Setting clear goals ┆203
Exercise 2: Pay attention to what your brain is telling you ┆207
Exercise 3: Practice Alternative Plan Thinking ┆210
Exercise 4: Talk to Yourself with Compassion ┆212
Exercise 5: Practice refactoring questions ┆214
Exercise 6: Get moving and play more┆216
What to do tonight ┆218
Chapter 11 Learning Disabilities, Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, and Autism Spectrum Disorders ┆220
Learning Disabilities┆222
Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder┆227
Autism Spectrum Disorders ┆234
What to do tonight ┆239
Chapter 12
SAT, ACT and four more letters ┆242
Generally speaking, exams suck.
NUTS ┆245
Parents, relax!
What to do tonight ┆260
Chapter 13 Are you ready to go to college? ┆262
You can't just muddle through in college┆268
Are they ready, or are they not ready yet? (How to tell if your child is ready) ┆269
What to do if your child isn't ready ┆273
I'll take your word for it, but I'll pay for it.
What to do tonight ┆277
Chapter 14 Alternative Route ┆278
Declaration of Youth Under Heavy Burden┆278
True reality┆281
The Virtue of Diversity┆282
Defeat the mob┆283
Bill┆285
Robin┆286
Brian┆287
Peter┆288
This┆289
Lachlan┆290
Melody┆290
"But..." Questions about alternative routes ┆291
About money, career and happiness┆293
What to do tonight┆294
Outlook┆295
Acknowledgements┆296
Notes ┆299
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